Again, I have been up for about an hour now, in the middle of the night. Funny thing is, my quasi-insomnia is all based on my current nesting instinct that is so strong, I find myself rearranging rooms while I'm talking to people.We walked through an apartment yesterday that we might have the opportunity to live in. In fact, the landlady said if we want it, its ours. No application fee or anything... its ours. It has a dishwasher and laundry, two conveniences I have lived without for the past year and a half (with a toddler I usually have to lug around with me everywhere, and who I have to keep occupied while I do dishes half the day). And it has a yard. A shared one, but its a yard. You don't get one when you live downtown above a cafe. It also doesn't smell like soup every day, all day. Believe me, you wouldn't enjoy it. Imagine enjoying an 8am bowl of cheerios, a banana, drinking your OJ, when all of a sudden the smell of clams completely overtakes your senses. Yeah, pretty nasty.
Downsides to the new apartment are... one less bedroom (although, our current layout is so awkward, we may as well not even have that extra bedroom to begin with), neighbors 24/7 (right now, we only have neighbors while the business is open, and loud ones at that), a "commute" (3 minutes instead of 30 seconds), freedom to paint, construct, or move out at will (we'd have a yearly lease in the new apt). We also wouldn't have readily available wireless internet, which both Aaron and I depend on for survival. And no cable, but I can live without it (despite Aaron's insisting that I won't be able to cope without Survivor). :)
In addition to all these pros and cons, I continue to think, "Am I just going to always be unsatisfied with where I am?" Could I really put up with this soup-smelling, really-hot-in-the-summer, no-dishwasher-or-laundry apartment, just for another year, or maybe even more?
After all, we do have food, shelter, heat, and family. That's more than a lot of people have.
So really, I come to no conclusion. I keep waiting for someone, anyone, to tell me what to do.
1 comment:
So sorry to hear about the insomnnia...this is my first pregnancy with it, but it seems to have just been mostly in the first few months. I hope yours gets better quickly!
Wow, what a HARD decision about the apartment. I hear you on all the great reasons to move-and I can't imagine being prego and having to smell clams...yikes!
I will pray that the Lord shows you EXACTLY where He wants you and gives you peace along the way.
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